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MAMU : Oye, maar gayay yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath AA rehli hain. MAMU KA DOST : Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha.

Tum apun ko itna sms karta hai.. Apun ko reply karneko majbur karta hai.. Kya iske peeche koi plan hai.. Ya auro ki tarah tum bhi apun ka fan hai..

MUNNA BHAI visits Mysore palace. CIRCUIT: bhai us kursi par mat baithna. MUNNA: kaiku ? CIRCUIT: wo tipu sultan ki he bhai. MUNNA: tension kaiku leta he re maamu ? aayega to uth jaunga re ,i shappath !!!

Abhi bole to bhai ko tere SMS nahi aarele, Bhai ka khopdi boht tight he, Bol nikalu kya tera luky draw? bole to do-char SMS chipka dal mamu.

MUNNA BHAI : Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya? GIRL : Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol pada?

PROFESSOR: Aqal badi ki bhains? MUNNA BHAI: Bole to pehlay date of birth to bata mamu..

Munna: Teray ko maaloom hai k cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karta ha Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi ha.

Circuit: Bhai, American President Kahan Rehta Hy? Munna: Dhobighaat Pe Circuit: Dhobighaat Bolay Tu . . . ? Munna: English Me Bolay Tu "Washing Town"..

MUNNA BHAI visits Mysore palace. CIRCUIT: bhai us kursi par mat baithna. MUNNA: kaiku ? CIRCUIT: wo tipu sultan ki he bhai. MUNNA: tension kaiku leta he re maamu ? aayega to uth jaunga re ,i shappath.

PROFESSOR: Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jantey ho? MUNNA BHAI:Gandhi bahut jabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin malum ke yeh Jayanti kaun ha.